getting back to my space

 Wow! 

I did not realize this space existed anymore but i browsed, because i had the energy to do so today and i found it. In a sense, it was finding my old self, a renewed self and my old space where i used to be myself. I have not read any of the old blogs today, i just want to cherish finding it first - relish the find little by little like dark chocolate. 

I am getting back to whatever i had forgotton or lost over the last decade and a half of getting adjusted to a very different life - getting married, having a kid, losing my father, balancing work and home and travel, and then the covid work-from-home situation really pulled the plug on me. I am now on a long break from work, seeing a counsellor and having conversations, untangling the knots - as some call it, taking life slow, yet trying to achieve what's possible every day. 

I decided to take a much longer break when i became aware one day that i had forgotten to relax and be on a holiday. My body and my mind had not been on a break ever. Even on holidays it would be to organize one of the many social events for the kids, parents, cousin or self. So even on long leaves, i would be organizing and managing something, else, planning and organizing a holiday. Holidaying with kids is project management. Please deny if you can. 

In the past two months, i have gone back to what i like best - being around nature, touching trees, noticing the color or leaves, being around lakes and rivers. I have gone back to listening to music, buying and reading books. I am yet to pick up sketching and writing. This might be one of my first tries of filling a page with my thoughts except the journal that i keep almost regularly for theraupatic purposes. 

I am surrounded by many books as i write, and the visuals give me a pleasure that nothing else does. To be surrounded by the great minds, the words waiting to speak to me, the writers on my cupboard amongs colorful book covers is a different connection. I thoroughtly enjoyed a book about this topic by Margaret Atwood recently. But I am never in a flow like when reading a novel and immersing myself in a different world. I am super thrilled when i connect to the author through their work, especially when it is autobiographical in nature and is a true story. The power of words never seize to excite me. 

I hope to make this a regular thing now. I am shy to share this widely like a "blog"... "blog". I would like to publish it so i can find it easily in the future. I might share the link with a few close friends. I would not mind if they don't read it, would be glad if they did and gave some feedback - positive or for improvement. 

May be i can fish our my next project or plan or ideas for the future through these writings and we can plot and plan together. 

It is great to be back in this space, and it does feel like really coming back and finding treasure as i could scroll down to 2006. 

Thanks for reading thus far and let us connect through the magical words! Ciao!